Friday, February 15, 2013

Meandering thoughts..

I must admit I got used to living in Southern California and it is not as if I hate it here. I just got used to living in a metro area. Of deciding that you wanted something late at night and driving 5 minutes to get it, deciding really at any time of day and being able to drive at maximum 10 minutes to get it.

Here, not so much. Everything is pretty much a minimum of 20 minutes away. Okay maybe not EVERYTHING. Sometimes it just feels that way. I don't hate it here at all, I just don't love it here. God I am sure made sure of that so that when it comes time to move in June, it won't hurt so bad.

I must admit, I miss my moms group, I miss my friends especially my dear friend J and her adorable son S. I miss hanging out and going for soda. Or just hanging out together while the kids play. I miss the feeling of home. Where I lived never felt like home per se but the area did. I don't know if that makes sense to ya'll but it is how I felt.

I miss having good internet a lot too. The internet where I live is awful with only other options of awful. I have to be sitting on top of the modem practically to get decent internet, forget going to another room. It ain't gonna happen. I called, they made it run faster for a little bit, and then back to normal nearly dial up. I guess when you live at the edge of the world, slow internet and driving 20 minutes is normal and you adjust to it.

I am enjoying living in a house (mobile) rather than an apartment. I am really enjoying the kids having their own room. I love that there is a yard they can go play in. I enjoy that the lazy, laze around easy going cat, spidy lives here and the kids can adjust to having an animal. So there are so great things about this.

I love that my honey finally got the car of his dreams. 10 years dreaming of a cheap little convertible seems so sad, but that is what happened. and .. finally we were able to make that happen. I am so happy for him that he got his little car. I adore it because it is fun and of course because he enjoys it so. I know some have made commentary about him being a father of 2 and soon to be 3 and having a 2 seater. However, the reality is for him to have a car that would fit the kids means a mini van.. We will already have one for me. No point in him driving a mini van to work everyday with no kids in it, when he can drive a cute little two seater convertible and enjoy his few moments before a hard day and a few minutes after a hard day.

Don't judge what you don't understand.

I do wish the kids would sleep through the night though. I am ready to be able to get some sleep before D comes along. There are so great nights where they sleep all night in their own rooms, but does not happen every night. That would be awesome. So people have kids that sleep through the night at 4 days ( sister) but others are like me and working on over 4 years of not making it through the night. It will happen someday.

Ok.. I am up to late but was rearranging and moving into a different bedroom and I will suffer for this tomorrow.. but worth it..

night all..

God bless

Friday, February 8, 2013

Forgetting and Finding

I have to say I am loving working again. I had no idea how much I missed it. I guess in the midst of being a stay at home mom, you forget you. I certainly did. My last post mentioned you become such a stay at home mom, a mom you forget that you are also someone's wife. I am beginning to think that you become so immersed in being a mom, that you also forget you. The person you were before you became a mom, the person you could easily be again if you just put a little effort into you.

I have spent the last few days, maybe a week focusing on me. C for her husband, and C for myself. I am learning how to be a mother as well as a wife AND not lose myself in the mix. It is so easy to do. I did it. I am seriously hoping I can not do it again. Perhaps reading this blog a few times a year, will help me to NOT do that again.

I forgot how much I enjoy running an office. I know for some people that sounds AWFUL. I however love it. I always have. I love data entry, working a problem and fixing it, I love helping people in that environment. I just totally forgot that. And readers here is an odd bit for you, I believe that working again is making me better within the home front part of my life. I do work from home, it is ideal. It is however making me better at dealing with the home front part of it. I find that so interesting.

I am so enjoying also, doing my hair and makeup. I am remembering what it feels like to be a woman. I do hope all these changes have a positive impact on my little daughters. I don't want them to grow up and forgot who they are. They are wonderful little people and I love watching them grow and learn and come more into their own little personalities.

Well I am up too late again. So I hope everyone has a great day today and I am going to bed..

Night all..

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Self Care and how awesome it feels.

Again lots of changes going on here. Exciting ones for this stay at home mom. I have started helping my sister and her soon to be ex out with their business. So I am getting to get a taste of work again. I forgot how much I enjoy it.

I have also been on a self care kick the last few days. I got my hair cut, into a style for the first time in years. It looks great. I love it. It is more work than usual but it is totally worth it. I wore makeup for the first time today in a quite a while. I forgot how wonderful it feels to be pretty, sexy even. Not just someones mom. I forgot that you don't have to bland and boring to be someones mom. I forgot that I am a married woman and I am also someone's wife. I am glad that my sister helped me to remember that.

In addition to the hair and makeup I got my toes done and tonight I painted my fingers to match. I wore jewelry today even. I make jewelry but rarely wear it. It was wonderful to remember how fun jewelry makes you feel.

I finally bought the new purse and wallet I have been wanting. I also got a few other various self care items I have been interested in as well. I spent more than I usually would but I am justifying it by the fact that I have not done ANY self care in a long time. My husband has been so supportive.

Tonight he even took me and bought me some new perfume. I had been looking for a new perfume but had not make a real effort to get any. I did not like my old stuff anymore. It did not seem to fit. I found a new perfume tonight I absolutely love.

Also some wonderful glamorous deep red lipstick that makes me look HOT. MAC lipstick. Some of the best stuff ever. I love me some MAC lipstick. My hubby even came with me and helped me pick out the shade that both of liked.. That he thought was HOT on his wife.

I am glad to have a sister to help me remember that. I am also just as certain that my husband is as thankful to her maybe more.  Yep, I am certain that he is happy with my awesome sister.

How can anyone forget how good feeling good about yourself is... However I did and I am just as sure that I am not the only one.

Ladies, don't neglect yourself. Life is too short not to feel wonderful about yourself and to make yourself HOT for your partner.